I took the boys on a road trip this weekend so Pancho could have some time to do homework (like actual time to think without orangutans hollering in the background). My mom and I used to go on spontaneous road trips and there's just something about driving through country without a destination. I had a rough idea of where I wanted to go (East and not on freeways) and since it's 2016 and we live in Silicon Valley--I used GPS.
We had a blast! I learned that we live only 30 minutes from a valley of vineyards and I better take Pancho on a date soon! We wound through bright green hills on a two-lane road far from the freeway, the country music driving us forward (okay I was the only one singing). Flipper and Thumper played with each other while looking for trains and animals between patches of wildflowers.
We stopped at the first Mc.Donald's we saw once we were out of the hills and Thumper said, "Mom, I know this is a chicken nugget, but is there any chicken in it?" So perceptive, that one :-).
Onward to the strategically selected hotel with an indoor swimming pool. We settled in, played in the pool, went out for dinner, and watched cartoons in bed. The next morning, we cuddled in the giant king-size hotel bed, I enjoyed my coffee, we had breakfast and got back on the road to come home. Back to the city. I have to say, I really didn't want to come home. I wanted to see Pancho, of course, but there are times I just don't want to go back to real life.
As soon as I leave the city I feel this instant release, like I've just come 'home'. I enjoy it for as long as I can before I start daydreaming about what life would be like. What if we lived here? What would we do for work? I always wanted to own a farm...or a vineyard. Would the kids like it? What would they miss from city life? What's stopping us? I even start looking at houses online and check out the quality of schools in different neighborhoods. The time always feels too short and back to the city we go. But then, as soon as we hit the edges of the city, I get excited about the work I'm doing and the potential to have far-reaching, international impact in a way I don't think I could have otherwise. So my thoughts shift to scheming how far out we could live while having our feet in both worlds. Would I spend all my time commuting? Would I ever get to enjoy the 'slow' life if I continue to work in the 'fast' lane? The desire to get off the proverbial 'treadmill' is very strong for me right now but I can't separate these feelings from general feelings of wanting to retire and pursue my hobbies in the countryside after I've left my mark on the world...note that the desire to leave my mark is still there so perhaps I've got to nail that one down first.
Question of the year: what sort of impact do I want to have on the world? It's funny, as a university recruiter, candidates ask me all the time what advice I have for them as they start their careers. The advice I give is the advice I am still trying to internalize. Narrow your interests, pick three general categories (know that they can and will change). Next, identify what sort of impact you want to have on the world. Make sure that each step you take drives you toward making that impact in one of the three areas. Three is arbitrary but I can tell you from personal experience, you have to narrow if you ever want to achieve a meaningful level of impact.
I still haven't defined my impact or narrowed my interests BUT I am taking steps to do both--each Friday I have set aside one hour of introspection time so you can expect much more strategic direction from me this year :-).
These last few weeks I've been daydreaming of life as an author, living in the country, raising my boys, taking them to all of their after school activities, and selling my photography online. At other times, I want to be a political appointee and bring change to federal agencies. I think about going to law school and practicing immigration law, getting an MBA and shifting into business operations at my current company, consulting big companies on people operations and unconscious bias, finding my place in advocacy through organizations that are important to me like LeanIn.org or the Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Media. I even have moments of crazy when I want to learn to code and become an engineer.
Patience has never been my virtue, at least that's one thing I know to be true about myself. Writing is helpful, sometimes just putting my thoughts out there helps them leave my mind and frees up more space to focus...and narrow.
I tend to relate emotions to songs (if you haven't noticed) so, here are two songs that defined my weekend.
Natasha Bedingfield, "Unwritten"
I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
Florida-Georgia Line, "Dirt"
You get your hands in it, plant your roots in it
Dusty head lights dance with your boots in it
You write her name on it, spin your tires on it
Build your corn field, whiskey bonfires on it
You bet your life on it
It's that elm shade, red rust clay you grew up on
That plowed up ground that your dad damned his luck on
That postgame party field you circle up on
And when it rains you get stuck on
Drift a cloud back behind county roads that you run up
The mud on her jeans that she peeled off and hung up
Her blue eyed summertime smile looks so good that it hurts
Makes you wanna build a ten percent down white picket fence house on this dirt
You've mixed some sweat with it, taken a shovel to it
You've stuck some crosses and some painted goal posts through it
You know you came from it
And someday you'll return to it...
We had a blast! I learned that we live only 30 minutes from a valley of vineyards and I better take Pancho on a date soon! We wound through bright green hills on a two-lane road far from the freeway, the country music driving us forward (okay I was the only one singing). Flipper and Thumper played with each other while looking for trains and animals between patches of wildflowers.
We stopped at the first Mc.Donald's we saw once we were out of the hills and Thumper said, "Mom, I know this is a chicken nugget, but is there any chicken in it?" So perceptive, that one :-).
Onward to the strategically selected hotel with an indoor swimming pool. We settled in, played in the pool, went out for dinner, and watched cartoons in bed. The next morning, we cuddled in the giant king-size hotel bed, I enjoyed my coffee, we had breakfast and got back on the road to come home. Back to the city. I have to say, I really didn't want to come home. I wanted to see Pancho, of course, but there are times I just don't want to go back to real life.
As soon as I leave the city I feel this instant release, like I've just come 'home'. I enjoy it for as long as I can before I start daydreaming about what life would be like. What if we lived here? What would we do for work? I always wanted to own a farm...or a vineyard. Would the kids like it? What would they miss from city life? What's stopping us? I even start looking at houses online and check out the quality of schools in different neighborhoods. The time always feels too short and back to the city we go. But then, as soon as we hit the edges of the city, I get excited about the work I'm doing and the potential to have far-reaching, international impact in a way I don't think I could have otherwise. So my thoughts shift to scheming how far out we could live while having our feet in both worlds. Would I spend all my time commuting? Would I ever get to enjoy the 'slow' life if I continue to work in the 'fast' lane? The desire to get off the proverbial 'treadmill' is very strong for me right now but I can't separate these feelings from general feelings of wanting to retire and pursue my hobbies in the countryside after I've left my mark on the world...note that the desire to leave my mark is still there so perhaps I've got to nail that one down first.
Question of the year: what sort of impact do I want to have on the world? It's funny, as a university recruiter, candidates ask me all the time what advice I have for them as they start their careers. The advice I give is the advice I am still trying to internalize. Narrow your interests, pick three general categories (know that they can and will change). Next, identify what sort of impact you want to have on the world. Make sure that each step you take drives you toward making that impact in one of the three areas. Three is arbitrary but I can tell you from personal experience, you have to narrow if you ever want to achieve a meaningful level of impact.
I still haven't defined my impact or narrowed my interests BUT I am taking steps to do both--each Friday I have set aside one hour of introspection time so you can expect much more strategic direction from me this year :-).
These last few weeks I've been daydreaming of life as an author, living in the country, raising my boys, taking them to all of their after school activities, and selling my photography online. At other times, I want to be a political appointee and bring change to federal agencies. I think about going to law school and practicing immigration law, getting an MBA and shifting into business operations at my current company, consulting big companies on people operations and unconscious bias, finding my place in advocacy through organizations that are important to me like LeanIn.org or the Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Media. I even have moments of crazy when I want to learn to code and become an engineer.
Patience has never been my virtue, at least that's one thing I know to be true about myself. Writing is helpful, sometimes just putting my thoughts out there helps them leave my mind and frees up more space to focus...and narrow.
I tend to relate emotions to songs (if you haven't noticed) so, here are two songs that defined my weekend.
Natasha Bedingfield, "Unwritten"
I am unwritten, can't read my mind, I'm undefined
I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
Florida-Georgia Line, "Dirt"
You get your hands in it, plant your roots in it
Dusty head lights dance with your boots in it
You write her name on it, spin your tires on it
Build your corn field, whiskey bonfires on it
You bet your life on it
It's that elm shade, red rust clay you grew up on
That plowed up ground that your dad damned his luck on
That postgame party field you circle up on
And when it rains you get stuck on
Drift a cloud back behind county roads that you run up
The mud on her jeans that she peeled off and hung up
Her blue eyed summertime smile looks so good that it hurts
Makes you wanna build a ten percent down white picket fence house on this dirt
You've mixed some sweat with it, taken a shovel to it
You've stuck some crosses and some painted goal posts through it
You know you came from it
And someday you'll return to it...
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