Bad Words and Chocolate

Not much has happened in the couple of weeks since we returned from Singapore except for a few parenthood moments that are definitely worth sharing.  Oh and the fumigation that happens every week, only now we have pictures.

Every so often we go to a nearby handicraft store to pick up some hand made souvenirs and enjoy chatting with the family who owns the store.  They recognize our car and wave when we pass on our way to other places during the week.  We stopped by last weekend and had Thumper with us for the first time.  The three of us were pursuing the items on the first floor when Thumper and I caught a glimpse of a backroom full of beautiful jewelry.  We wandered back and the gentleman working at the counter invited Thumper to sit on the glass case and play with a calculator.  Thumper was having a blast and the man told me I could go upstairs to shop if I'd like and he and another gentleman would watch Thumper.  Since Pancho was in eyesight I agreed, told Pancho I was headed upstairs, and went to go look at all of the gorgeous scarves, embroidered fabric, and carpets.  Upstairs, I met a man who had questions about travel to the United States and I happily provided information about the visa application process and requirements for non-immigrant travel to the U.S.  Not more than 15 minutes had passed before I returned back downstairs to a smiling face covered in chocolate.  I asked Pancho what happened and he nonchalantly told me they had give Thumper some chocolate.  Okay, fine, I thought.  Thumper has had chocolate before and he often gets a treat after dinner.  A treat the size of one jelly candy, or half of a banana muffin, two bites of ice cream...you get the gist.  I went to go wipe off his face and he said, "mama, chocolate all done!  More!!" just as the second gentleman returned with a full size chocolate bar from the store next door.  I realized that my not yet two year old son had just been given an entire adult-sized chocolate bar, consumed it in 15 minutes, and been offered a second approximately 20 minutes before nap time.  One of those moments that's funny, but only for a few hours, it's not funny anymore when nap time doesn't happen and you have dinner plans!

This weekend Thumper is off chocolate and convinced that fresh fruit is a treat.  I think we've made progress.  This morning the three of us were sitting in the living room waking up, Pancho and I with a little coffee, Thumper with a little milk.  Thumper was riding his bike all around talking about how he wants to name his baby brother or sister, "Orange," while Pancho and I were talking about life.  Pancho blurted out a "holy shit" in response to something I said and all of a sudden, just two weeks before his second birthday, our little sponge continues his bike ride yelling, "holy shiiiiit, holy shiiiiit, holy COW, holy shiiiit mama hahahahaha!"  So, of course we started laughing which only made him do it more.  We had our first talk about bad words and how daddy should have said "holy cow" and it appears as though he's forgotten the curse word for now.  Or he's just waiting to use it again :-)

Now, unrelated to parenting (mostly), I will leave you with a picture of what it looks like after two guys with shop vacs stroll through the courtyards of a building on their weekly mission to keep the bugs away.  This happens at restaurants, through the streets at times, and with less fog it happens on the airplane upon landing.  At least we feel more protected against Malaria and Dengue?

Singapore Part 2

A few funny highlights from Legs...

Our flight left Hyderabad at 11PM and arrived in Singapore at 6:15AM the next day...we both thought Thumper would sleep the whole way but he sure didn't!  During take off and landing he yelled, "Pilots driving TOO fast!"

Thank goodness the hotel let us check in early and we all crashed until the afternoon.  Like Pancho mentioned, we had our fair share of Starbucks, and with a good nap and some caffeine we set off to the Botanic Gardens.  We waited for green crossing lights, saw no burning trash, weren't concerned about being hit by a car, auto rickshaw, motorcycle, or cow, and headed straight for a big lake with lots of fish and turtles (see pictures from Pancho's post).  Pancho left out my favorite picture of an intersection in Singapore...note the differences.

Singapore

Hyderabad

We got to the lake and Thumper couldn't take his eyes off all the kids throwing bread to the fish and turtles.  Except I don't think he understood that they were throwing bread and he immediately took off his sunglasses and threw them in the lake.  They sank to the bottom and he frowned and said, "mama, glasses?"  But, losing his glasses did not deter him and at the next lake he promptly threw in his plastic construction toy; however, this item floated and Pancho did some crazy acrobatics to retrieve it from the pond.

The purpose of our trip was for medical care and to quote the Zac Brown Band, "There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know."  The facility was clean, the doctor was amazing, people listened to me and didn't just talk to Pancho, I had all of my questions answered, it wasn't invasive, and we got to see our little baby moving around on the ultrasound screen as a whole family.  The doctor even printed Thumper his own picture of the baby which he immediately put up to my stomach and said, "mama, baby sister!" To be clear, we don't know the gender yet but Thumper keeps saying "girl" and "baby sister" whenever we ask him what he thinks :-)

We returned to India refreshed on so many different levels.  Pancho speaks for the both of us about the new perspective we gained from this experience.  Singapore made us realize that the world is a big place...some places we will like, some we won't, but they aren't all good and they aren't all bad.  The great thing about this job is that you get to try something new every two years.  We have learned so much about ourselves and our family through this experience in India and we look forward to taking all of those lessons to heart when we bid for our next post.  I'm sure at our next post we will continue to learn and ultimately that's why we joined the Foreign Service...to learn about ourselves and to learn about others.

There are hard times when we miss family and familiarity of Western culture.  I broke down in tears the last time I left the doctor's office here after I had been walked in on twice while getting blood drawn...It wasn't that I didn't have privacy, it was that the other patients came in just to stare at me and they didn't leave until they were forcefully asked to do so.  Combined with everything else that had happened at the doctor visit I left with tears streaming.  I got to the car and our driver asked me what happened.  He listened and reassured me.  When we got out of the car he said, "You know you can ALWAYS take me with you to any appointment, you are not alone here...you are my sister."  I have never felt so comforted by someone I've known for such little time.  He is one of our best friends here and he is the reason why we chose this life.

Singapore

We had the most unbelievably amazing trip to Singapore.  Originally it was only going to be Legs to have a 12-week ultrasound, but at the last minute we bought tickets for Thumper and I too.  We are so incredibly happy that we all decided to go, because that one trip renewed our excitement for travelling the world, and Legs, Thumper, and I were able to see our new little person and hear their heartbeat for the first time together.

In the past few months Legs and I have really contemplated whether or not the Foreign Service lifestyle is right for us.  It would be an understatement to say that India is not what we anticipated.  It has been a very difficult adjustment for us here, and we constantly wonder whether living in India is a good experience for our family as a whole, a bad experience, or somewhere in between.

Travelling to new places is one of the things that brought Legs and I together in the first place, but after this post we've both started to wonder if maybe we're getting older and less capable of adapting to foreign environments.  Perhaps having a child has changed our mindset, and we just want things to be the way that's familiar.  Could we have been lulled into a false sense of enjoyment on our previous journeys because they were all relatively short-term?  Sometimes being a tourist in a new city gives you just the right amount of time to find all of the positives, and conveniently gloss over all of the negatives.

Singapore seemed to completely wash away those fears about whether or not we want to try another post.  I guess it may depend on where that next post is, but, nonetheless, we certainly want to find out.  Stepping off the plane was like stepping into a different dimension.  There was beautiful greenery everywhere, it was almost deafening how quite the streets were without all of the honking, I felt as free as a bird walking down the sidewalk without being pushed and yelled at to buy something, I felt safe in a city where there were rules like no littering or jaywalking and people obeyed them, I felt adventurous drinking tap water for the first time in 4 months, and I probably drank 10+ shots of Starbucks espresso in the three days we were there.

All of the things I just mentioned could just be 'developed country' things that we've been missing, but there were also many cultural things about Singapore that made our stay that much more amazing.  The city was extremely diverse and we regularly heard languages from all over the world, the people were some of the friendliest I've ever encountered, there was tons of natural green space interspersed throughout the city, and Singapore is innovative and efficient with it's public resources.  There were tons of things that we would have loved to do while we were there, like a night safari, a trip to the aquarium, or take a ride in the Singapore Flyer, but all we managed to do was a night cruise through Marina Bay and a beautiful walk through the Singapore Botanic Gardens.

It's hard to say what our impression of Singapore would have been had we traveled there directly from the U.S., but, what I can say is, it was a wonderful modern city reprieve from life in Hyderabad.  I'm still convinced that we would have loved Singapore either way, and I would absolutely recommend visiting if you're ever in the area.  Thank you for a delightful trip Singapore!

Here are some pictures from our trip:

Happy Travels!

Pancho